Today was one of the hardest days of my life. Maharaj left at 12 noon today. Maharaj let me talk to him for a few minutes before he left. He did leave me some instructions and he even let me type his blog one more time. He instructed me to continue serving Tulasi Devi and fix up the shoe rack a bit. He also told me to get along with the authorities here which i do. I have no problems with them. Maharaj also told me that after Toronto's trip if all goes well to go to Miami. He said he'd talk with the devotees there into letting me stay there for the winter. We'll see how that goes.
Earlier before Maharaj left...I was feeling very strange like I was going to physically collapse. I didn't want him to leave. He knew I was terrified about him leaving. So he had ran into Jaya Krishna and asked him to look after me and also another devotee named Tulasi too. Maharaj knew I needed support.
Now Im finding myself BEGGING Sri Sri Radha Gopinatha to let me come back to Them. I will have to try and get a bus ticket to Buffalo. I HAVE to go to Toronto this week. I JUST HAVE to. Im feeling so homesick being away from Them as it is even more so now that Maharaj left this afternoon.
Tomorrow is Lord Nrsimahadeva's Appearance Day My favorite time of the year. hopefully that will help me ease the pain of separation from my guru Maharaj.
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