Well it's been a tough week but somehow I managed to pull through it. I had been having severe emotional problems. Most of it was due to homesickness. I have to call Dayal more often to talk to him.I talked to him on Friday on the way back from going into town. I caught him while he was driving to go to practice with his band that night.He told me that he'd send me some Prabhupada lectures to listen to everyday to help me overcome these emotional problems. I also read Prabhupada's books everyday when i can too to help.
The emotional feelings I'd had been having though it just felt like I had everyone gang up on me on the service that i have been doing. That's when I felt like I was doing everything wrong and not the way they wanted it done. But lately now they leave me alone. So I have been feeling a lot better. Although when I had those emotional feelings I came close to moving back to Cleveland. but I want to talk with Maharaj about this too and see what he says in what I should do if I feel like I am not going to make it in New Vrndavan. But so far I'm okay with it now.
Yesterday too I ran into an incident as well. This tall indian gentleman was talking so harshly to Rupa Nuga about some problem he saw go on outside the temple. I was just sitting waiting patiently for the gentleman to finish talking to him, and after he was finished this gentleman wrongly accused me of looking at him the wrong way like he was a kid or something. He asked me how old I was and then rudely said that he was more than twice my age and demanded respect from me. Then he cursed me by saying Krishna would not let me stay at the temple or He'd punish me in some way for an offense I had no clue that I committed. This gentleman acted as if it was a great sin I committed. So I simply said to him, Please excuse my offense I did not know I committed an offense. The gentleman just looked at me sternly then walked away. So I didn't let this bother me. I did my best to try to be humble and I'm sure Krishna saw that I at least tried.
