This morning I felt kind of groggy getting up. I managed to chant half of my rounds before Mangal Aarti and finished the rest after it. I really hate feeling so tired and groggy when I get up. I do get proper sleep. Im in bed by 9pm most of the time and I get up at 3am. It's an up and down feeling with me sometimes when I feel tired in the mornings and other mornings I feel more energized. But I want to feel energized every morning not just sometimes.
I went to Mangal Aarti this morning like I do every morning. The Deities were wearing a pretty red night outfit. Krsna Himself looked beautiful as usual. He becomes more and more beautiful every time I look at Him. At times when I see Him I feel like I can't move because I am stunned by His beauty. At the Deity Greeting from a distance I could see His beautiful smile as I know He is happy to see His devotees greeting Him first thing in the morning. I had to wait ten minutes to get pictures of the Deities. I need to have a clear view to do that. I have the pictures up already they are in my previous post here on my blog wearing the green and gold outfit.
Today's class was about Mahavendra Puri who was a great devotee of the Lord. There was a funny story about his Deity Gopal that Gopal had stolen the sweet rice. I thought that was pretty funny. That remind me of my favorite Deities of Sri Sri Radha Ksiracora Gopinatha in Toronto. Ksiracora also means to steal sweet rice. When I was listening to the class in the pujari room I was making flower garlands for the small Lord Jagannatha Deities and also washing the Deity plates. As I was washing the last of the Deities' plates i noticed there was a piece of maha pear stuck to the plate. What mercy I thought. I don't deserve it. But I guess the Deities wanted me to have it so They saved it for me by having it left stuck to Their plate. I am not sure which Deities' plate it was from but I felt it was Krsna Himself feeding me a little piece of His remnants. That was pure nectar.
After class was over I wanted to see Krsna again. I stood there looking at Him for about five minutes. I was up close to the altar. I was just relishing His beauty and smile. I hope I can make it for the 12 noon Aarti today to see Krsna again otherwise I'll have to wait until later this afternoon to see Him again.
Somehow or other as much as I want to return to Toronto to my favorite Deities, it seems as if Sri Sri Rukmini Dwarkadish want me to stay in their temple. But I cannot speculate on that. I just have to wait and see where I will go this summer. Krsna knows my desires but Prabhupada instructed us to fullfill Krsna's desire by serving Him with love and dovotion.
