It was sad the last few days were sad ones. I didn't want to leave Toronto. But seeing that I am a United States citizen I had to come back. I still wonder if there is a way to come back to Toronto permanantly. I hope Krishna will make the arrangements. Most of my prayers have been answered in the Krishna Conciousness movement. We are taught not to pray to God for anything material only to stay in His service to serve Him with love and devotion. Because I remember when I was younger before joining the movement, my prayers never really been answered because I was too materialistic. But since I've learned to be detached from it since it's only temporary in this world.
But anyways on Wednesday morning my guru Maharaj was leaving for Vancouver. He had left at 4:30am in the morning. He paged me over the phone intercom to his office. He asked me to clean prabhupada's room upstairs since guests were coming to stay there. I had offered my obeisances to him and again to him before he left. I still begged for his mercy to stay in Krishna's service so that I can spiritually advance. And before he left he handed me one of the maha prasadam sweets and said to me "Have one of these and you will be alright." I love his sweet quality about him. He's so kind to me. He's been the most tolerant with me more than anyone else has been to me. I miss him a lot. I hope he will come to Los Angeles for a visit. I feel a lot of painful separation from him.
Friday I spent lunch with Radha and Tara and Mahavendra Puri. On Tuesday I had lunch with Sam and Maharaj. Maharaj had asked me if I was okay because that morning I had a splitting headache and couldn't go to class because my headach was so bad that i had to lie down. But again I love how Maharaj has so much concern for others. :)
Then also on Friday morning I had spoken with Rashmin as I was training her how to transplant tulasi and then we talked for about an hour after that getting in some last minute association. I also talked with Pranesvari on Friday night for about an hour too.
On Saturday morning I attended the morning program. I didn't go to class as I had to finsih last minute packing, and then Mahavendra Puri asked me to make a salad a half an hour I was supposed to leave. I guess the Deities needed me to do some last minute service. Then I went to offer my obeisances to them and I also took care of Tulasi that morning before I left some last minute seva for her and I said good bye to her too. It was also hard saying good bye to Brahma Prabhu and his wife. They always made me laugh in the morning with their jokes and stories. I will surely miss them becasue of their unique personality.
I hope and pray to Krishna that He will bring me back to Toronto quickly.
