I've been thinking a lot about second initiation, and how much I would love to do things on the altar for Their Lordships Sri Sri Radha and Krishna. I know I am not quite ready yet for second initiation. But it never hurts think about it. Second initiation to me means more surrender to Krishna, which is what I wish to do. I have no interest in living outside the temple, because I fear if I do, Maya(illusion) will attack me. I also have no interest in family life(I don't want to start a family of my own).
This is one reason why I am taking on new servicesto spiritually advance more. Learning to cook, sing, and play musical instruments are the new services I took on. And I just recently started doing Guru Puja Aarti for Srila Prabhupada. So this is helping me fill in the empty spots in my devotional service to Krishna.
I also need to practice sanskrit more too. My sanskrit is improving slowly. I should try to chant the sanskrit in the Bhagavad Gita, but some verses are very difficult for me to chant. Im going to try and set a time everyday if I can to chant sanskrit verses somehow. Seems like around 5pm is when I have free time to do that. I am wondering too if I should ever get second initiation that I would be giving class on Bhagavad Gita or Srimad Bhagavatam if I get better with sanskrit. Im not very good with preaching but maybe someone here can show me how to give class one day. I may inquire to Maharaj about it one day when the time comes.
In the mean time I just hope and pray that Krishna will help me to surrender more unto Him, so that He may allow me to take on second initiation someday. :)
