Since Maharaj came back and even before then,I find myself always offering my humble obeisances to him at his lotus feet both in the morning and evening before I go to bed when he is here. I also offer him Tulasi's flower after I offer it to her. And just this morning a realization hit me as I had offered my obeisances to him.
I had asked Maharaj this morning when he was leaving and he said in five minutes so I immediately bowed down to his lotus feet and when I did that I felt so sheltered and protected by him. I feel like there is a protective shield around me every time I offer my obeisances to him. Im so happy that Maharaj is so kind and thoughtful, gentle, and caring to everyone.
I do the same for Srila Prabhupada as well because I have been going to the last darshan lately. So I feel protected by Srila Prabhupada as well. I have something nice in mind to write in my offering to my guru maharaj when his appearance day comes. I just want it to be something that will touch his heart and something he won't forget.
I also feel the same when I offer obeisances to the Deities at Their Lotus Feet. They too make you feel sheltered and protected. Im grateful Krishna gave me this realization. I just may write this in my guru maharaj's offering for his appearance day. I just have to figure out how to say it.
People who are non devotees may think it strange bowing down before a spiritual master or priest but it should be done because he is a representive of God as he does preach about God which is why we bow down to our guru maharaj. It is said that the spiritual master is to be honored as much as the Supreme Lord because he is the most confidential servitor of the Lord. The spiritual master is not to be thought of as an ordinary person. He is a spiritual person. And I believe in that about my spiritual master. In fact my guru maharaj reminds me so much of Lord Chaitanya because he is so merciful and very tolerant of everyone and everything. So I know for sure that my guru Maharaj is very spiritual and he came from the spiritual world to here to help us return home to Krishna as Srila Prabhupada did when he was present in this world.
So I believe as long as I keep offering my obeisances to my guru Maharaj I know I will always feel sheltered and protected by him. One cannot make any spiritual advancement without the grace of the spiritual master.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
Tulasi Is Still Keeping Me Busy
Well Tulasi Devi sure is still keeping me busy.I had no idea that she'd be allowing me to serve her like this. I wasn't doing much in the beginning but somehow or other Srimate Radharani or Krishna Himself must have seen my desire to serve their pure devotee Tulasi Devi.
Today I had spent nearly 5 hours in her green house in the sweltering heat. But service needed to be done for her. I have so many baby Tulasis to care for and I transplanted 19 of them today because they were too big for the seedling container. I needed to wash her pots and then add fresh soil to them. I think she will grow a lot faster if she is in her own pot instead of all together in a seedling container. Most of the Baby Tulasis are getting ready to grow another set of leaves! Some of them are looking so pretty even now and Im finding myself very much attached to her becasue of how pretty she looks. She maybe tiny now but her leaves are looking big and beautiful. And she is only about three weeks old! She is growing quickly.
Just these past few days I had more baby Tulasis appear. After I had transplanted one of the bigger Tulasis, three more baby ones had appeared and I did not even plant these. I don't know how she got there. This Tulasi is hanging over on the side of teh pot so there was no way seeds could have fallen in there! Unless these seeds have been there but got lost in the soil and maybe somehow found their way near the top so that they could grow. So today i put them in their own pot as well so as not to get lost in the soil becasue they are so tiny. Then this morning when was nearly finished taking care of her I found yet ANOTHER baby Tulasi come up in the seedling container. I could have sworn she was done growing all her seeds. I was not expecting any more to pop up but apparently she is still linguiring in the soil somewhere still I think.
I always keep my guru Maharaj updated on how the baby Tulasis are doign and I always offer him a flower from Tulasi after I had offered it to her. He had told me to keep serving her and that she will take care of me. I also told him that I think Tulasi is trying to tell me something, and he said it's because she loves me but I don't deserve that kind of love from a pure devotee as I am still materially contaminated. Tulasi must be happy with the service I am doing for her at least I hope I am pleasing her because if she is pleased Krishna Himself is pleased.
I always go up to Tulasi's green house three times a day usually depending on how hot it is. I went up there three times today. I chant my rounds to her during japa in her greenhosue,,then after class I take care of her, and then later in the afternoon I try doing a little maha clean up in her greenhouse or I transplant her if she needs it or trim manjaris if I run out of time in the morning. When I clean her room though I still feel as though it's still not clean enough for her! I feel that there still is something to do in her greenhouse. Tulasi usually lets me know what she wants done. Other times I can figure it out myself what needs to be done.
My guru Maharaj will be going on his fourth walk across Canada soon. So I know I will keep busy withTulasi until he returns. He's been travelling so much nd I find myself missing him a lot but Tulasi helps ease the pain of separation from him because he instructed me to take care of her so when I take care of her I can feel my guru maharaj's presence while he's away.
All glories to Tulasi Maharani.
Today I had spent nearly 5 hours in her green house in the sweltering heat. But service needed to be done for her. I have so many baby Tulasis to care for and I transplanted 19 of them today because they were too big for the seedling container. I needed to wash her pots and then add fresh soil to them. I think she will grow a lot faster if she is in her own pot instead of all together in a seedling container. Most of the Baby Tulasis are getting ready to grow another set of leaves! Some of them are looking so pretty even now and Im finding myself very much attached to her becasue of how pretty she looks. She maybe tiny now but her leaves are looking big and beautiful. And she is only about three weeks old! She is growing quickly.
Just these past few days I had more baby Tulasis appear. After I had transplanted one of the bigger Tulasis, three more baby ones had appeared and I did not even plant these. I don't know how she got there. This Tulasi is hanging over on the side of teh pot so there was no way seeds could have fallen in there! Unless these seeds have been there but got lost in the soil and maybe somehow found their way near the top so that they could grow. So today i put them in their own pot as well so as not to get lost in the soil becasue they are so tiny. Then this morning when was nearly finished taking care of her I found yet ANOTHER baby Tulasi come up in the seedling container. I could have sworn she was done growing all her seeds. I was not expecting any more to pop up but apparently she is still linguiring in the soil somewhere still I think.
I always keep my guru Maharaj updated on how the baby Tulasis are doign and I always offer him a flower from Tulasi after I had offered it to her. He had told me to keep serving her and that she will take care of me. I also told him that I think Tulasi is trying to tell me something, and he said it's because she loves me but I don't deserve that kind of love from a pure devotee as I am still materially contaminated. Tulasi must be happy with the service I am doing for her at least I hope I am pleasing her because if she is pleased Krishna Himself is pleased.
I always go up to Tulasi's green house three times a day usually depending on how hot it is. I went up there three times today. I chant my rounds to her during japa in her greenhosue,,then after class I take care of her, and then later in the afternoon I try doing a little maha clean up in her greenhouse or I transplant her if she needs it or trim manjaris if I run out of time in the morning. When I clean her room though I still feel as though it's still not clean enough for her! I feel that there still is something to do in her greenhouse. Tulasi usually lets me know what she wants done. Other times I can figure it out myself what needs to be done.
My guru Maharaj will be going on his fourth walk across Canada soon. So I know I will keep busy withTulasi until he returns. He's been travelling so much nd I find myself missing him a lot but Tulasi helps ease the pain of separation from him because he instructed me to take care of her so when I take care of her I can feel my guru maharaj's presence while he's away.
All glories to Tulasi Maharani.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Last Nights Home Program
Don't get me wrong. I love home programs. And this one was particularly great. I loved it except toward the end where everyone was crammed into the small temple room downstairs in the house. But other than that it was a great program all around.
Three sanniyasis were there and my guru Maharaj Bhaktimarga Swami was one of them. My guru Maharaj led a fantastic kirtan as he always does. I love how he leads kirtan and his singing voice is great! Better than the karmi musicians I used to like. Now if I see any concert, I only want to see my guru Maharaj lead kirtan. He is my favorite and always will be.
Then the other two guru maharajs gave lectures. I really liked the one guru maharaj as he had a sense of humor as he told the stories about Krishna and the gopis. I liked him.I enjoyed the past times that the other two guru maharajs gave about Krishna. It was nectar to my ears. After that there were girls who danced on stage and a light drama about baby krishna. Then my guru Maharaj led kirtan again, and he led everyone downstairs to the temple room. However I could not stay for long because it was too small of a room with too many people in it. I felt too crammed and felt like i couldn't breath so I went outside to get some air. I tried to chant some rounds while I waited for everyone to come back up. I was feeling tired exhausted, and a bit upset. Maharaj then came up and saw me. He came over to me to check on me to see if I was okay. He knew I was exhausted and wanted to go back to the temple. He was so kind to me and gave me comfort. He is the only one who can calm me down when i get stressed out. He told me I didn't have to go to Mangal Aarti the next morning but I did anyway. I cannot bear going without seeing krishna first thing in the morning. Krishna is what keeps me going through out the day if i see Him first thing.
So today Im resting up a bit. Im in my room because i need a break from the crowds. I should be okay and recovered by tomorrow. but other than that the program was still nice. :)
Three sanniyasis were there and my guru Maharaj Bhaktimarga Swami was one of them. My guru Maharaj led a fantastic kirtan as he always does. I love how he leads kirtan and his singing voice is great! Better than the karmi musicians I used to like. Now if I see any concert, I only want to see my guru Maharaj lead kirtan. He is my favorite and always will be.
Then the other two guru maharajs gave lectures. I really liked the one guru maharaj as he had a sense of humor as he told the stories about Krishna and the gopis. I liked him.I enjoyed the past times that the other two guru maharajs gave about Krishna. It was nectar to my ears. After that there were girls who danced on stage and a light drama about baby krishna. Then my guru Maharaj led kirtan again, and he led everyone downstairs to the temple room. However I could not stay for long because it was too small of a room with too many people in it. I felt too crammed and felt like i couldn't breath so I went outside to get some air. I tried to chant some rounds while I waited for everyone to come back up. I was feeling tired exhausted, and a bit upset. Maharaj then came up and saw me. He came over to me to check on me to see if I was okay. He knew I was exhausted and wanted to go back to the temple. He was so kind to me and gave me comfort. He is the only one who can calm me down when i get stressed out. He told me I didn't have to go to Mangal Aarti the next morning but I did anyway. I cannot bear going without seeing krishna first thing in the morning. Krishna is what keeps me going through out the day if i see Him first thing.
So today Im resting up a bit. Im in my room because i need a break from the crowds. I should be okay and recovered by tomorrow. but other than that the program was still nice. :)
Saturday, August 20, 2011
Forest of Baby Tulasis
Well it has been a week now since the new baby Tulasis started growing. These baby Tulasis are for Sri Sri Radha Ksiracora Gopinatha. I fear that some of the older Tulasis may leave their body this winter after I leave which is why I am growing these baby ones that way Krishna will still have Tulasi offered to His Lotus Feet and Tulasi manjaris to wear.
Two baby Tulasis are just about a week old. And the rest of them had appeared just a few days earlier. Most of them had opened her leaves. The two oldest ones are ready to grow a second set of leaves.
Three times a day I check on baby Tulasi. This morning when I went to take care of her and also to chant my rounds I had discovered that about 10 of them appeared in the seedling container. Then later in the morning I found six more baby Tulasis that had appeard. She seems to be responding quickly to the service I have been doing. And I love taking care of her. She brings happiness and comfort to me.
So ever since these baby Tulasis have appeared I have become much much MUCH more attached to Tulasi than I was before. I seem to always be in her green house and at times I feel like she doesn't want me to leave her greenhouse either. Im very happy my guru Maharaj told me to continue serving Tulasi becasue he said that Tulasi will help me stay anchored in Krishna Conciousness.
Two baby Tulasis are just about a week old. And the rest of them had appeared just a few days earlier. Most of them had opened her leaves. The two oldest ones are ready to grow a second set of leaves.
Three times a day I check on baby Tulasi. This morning when I went to take care of her and also to chant my rounds I had discovered that about 10 of them appeared in the seedling container. Then later in the morning I found six more baby Tulasis that had appeard. She seems to be responding quickly to the service I have been doing. And I love taking care of her. She brings happiness and comfort to me.
So ever since these baby Tulasis have appeared I have become much much MUCH more attached to Tulasi than I was before. I seem to always be in her green house and at times I feel like she doesn't want me to leave her greenhouse either. Im very happy my guru Maharaj told me to continue serving Tulasi becasue he said that Tulasi will help me stay anchored in Krishna Conciousness.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Taking Shelter of Tulasi Devi
Well those other plants that I thought were Tulasi turned out not to be her. I don't know why they have a bag of seeds in her room when they are not her seeds.
So now I have used seeds from her manjaris to grow her. Three of them have sprouted but unfortunately one of them did not make it because she was much too tiny I think she got lost in the soil somewhere but she was in a seedling container like the others are so that wouldn't happen but it still did. I was upset about that. But the two that have survived are doing well and have opened their leaves almost. :) She may be big enough by the time my guru Maharaj comes back to see her. She may even have a second set of leaves by then I hope.
I also planted a few extra seeds again in case the other seeds i planted do not grow. I hope to see a few more tulasis grow.
Lately I just can't seem to get myself away from Tulasi's greenhouse. And later in the day I feel like she is calling me to come back upstairs to her. She has been such good company for me while my guru Maharaj has been away. I chant my rounds in her green house, and then I also make manjari tulasi garlands for Krishna while Im in her green house. I feel that is like my safe haven is in her green house. Even this evening when I was in her green house I didn't even want to leave her especially the baby Tulasis that are growing. I spend most of my time in her green house after I do my other services.
Anyone can take care of Tulasi if they have pure love and devotion for her. Titles do not matter or who you are a disciple of. My guru Maharaj specifically instructed me to continue serving Tulasi Maharani and I am strictly following his instructions on this one. He wants me to serve her. So by serving her I am also serving my guru and Krishna. I must be doing something right if she is now growing well. I always ask forgivness from her if I have committed any offenses to her and I thank her for allowing us to serve Krishna. I am a very fallen soul but yet Tulasi is still very merciful. I am still aspiring to be her maidservant always. :) I never want to leave her association now. She helps to ease the pain of separation from my guru Maharaj while he's away. I hope in Los Angeles I can do something for her. Hopefully I can chant near her greenhosue outside too in Los Angeles as well. I never saw their Tulasi greenhouse in Los Angeles. Hopefully when I go there I will. I don't want to lose sight of Tulasi Devi or lose out on doing service for her. Krishna says that if one serves His pure devotee, then that person is directly serving Him. So I am trying to surrender myself under Tulasi Devi's service so that I can serve Krishna at the same time.
So now I have used seeds from her manjaris to grow her. Three of them have sprouted but unfortunately one of them did not make it because she was much too tiny I think she got lost in the soil somewhere but she was in a seedling container like the others are so that wouldn't happen but it still did. I was upset about that. But the two that have survived are doing well and have opened their leaves almost. :) She may be big enough by the time my guru Maharaj comes back to see her. She may even have a second set of leaves by then I hope.
I also planted a few extra seeds again in case the other seeds i planted do not grow. I hope to see a few more tulasis grow.
Lately I just can't seem to get myself away from Tulasi's greenhouse. And later in the day I feel like she is calling me to come back upstairs to her. She has been such good company for me while my guru Maharaj has been away. I chant my rounds in her green house, and then I also make manjari tulasi garlands for Krishna while Im in her green house. I feel that is like my safe haven is in her green house. Even this evening when I was in her green house I didn't even want to leave her especially the baby Tulasis that are growing. I spend most of my time in her green house after I do my other services.
Anyone can take care of Tulasi if they have pure love and devotion for her. Titles do not matter or who you are a disciple of. My guru Maharaj specifically instructed me to continue serving Tulasi Maharani and I am strictly following his instructions on this one. He wants me to serve her. So by serving her I am also serving my guru and Krishna. I must be doing something right if she is now growing well. I always ask forgivness from her if I have committed any offenses to her and I thank her for allowing us to serve Krishna. I am a very fallen soul but yet Tulasi is still very merciful. I am still aspiring to be her maidservant always. :) I never want to leave her association now. She helps to ease the pain of separation from my guru Maharaj while he's away. I hope in Los Angeles I can do something for her. Hopefully I can chant near her greenhosue outside too in Los Angeles as well. I never saw their Tulasi greenhouse in Los Angeles. Hopefully when I go there I will. I don't want to lose sight of Tulasi Devi or lose out on doing service for her. Krishna says that if one serves His pure devotee, then that person is directly serving Him. So I am trying to surrender myself under Tulasi Devi's service so that I can serve Krishna at the same time.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Serving Guru In Separation
I always find this difficult. It is because I am around my guru Maharaj so much that is hard for me to realize that even the service I am doing for him I am still serving him in separation. And serving guru in separation they say is the highest service one can do.
The reason why I find it a bit difficult, is because when my guru Maharaj is here at the temple, he always lets me know if he was pleased with the service I do for him. And also sometimes he adds on little service for me to do for him. Maharaj gives everyone a chance to do some type of service for him. He's so merciful when it comes to that. He doesn't leave anyone out.
Now my guru Maharaj is away on a north american bus tour and he won't return until August 23rd. So I am still doing my service for him although lately I've had no wood polish so I could not do that service for him and I felt a bit upset about it. But today I went to the dollar store and found some wood polish for 2 dollars. I can't stand it when there is a certain type of service I have ot do for Maharaj and I don't have the product for it to complete the service. I want to keep up with the cleaning and have it nice by the time he comes back. August 22nd will be much too busy to really try to get anything done because there will be so many people here so I want to try to finish the cleaning before hand.
Everytime Maharaj is away I always get terrified thinking "Am I serving Maharaj properly? Am I pleasing him?" I am very concious of this. Im determined to keep my guru Maharaj very pleased.
I've should have asked him this over the phone whne I talked to him but we didn't have time he was very very busy.
Sometimes too I always get concerned about when I am invited to go somewhere with devotees, but to me it didn't seem very spiritual and I feel like I must consult with Maharaj first. I hate doing things without his approval. It's just how I am. I'm trying to train myself to keep my mind focused on just Krishna. Even the smallest of things will disturb me when I am trying to focus on Krishna. So this is one reason why if I feel to me something doesn't feel right about going to a certain place or doing a certain thing, I feel I must have Maharaj's approval first. I love going out with devotees, just as long as it's something spiritual because my mind needs to be fixed on Krishna.
The reason why I find it a bit difficult, is because when my guru Maharaj is here at the temple, he always lets me know if he was pleased with the service I do for him. And also sometimes he adds on little service for me to do for him. Maharaj gives everyone a chance to do some type of service for him. He's so merciful when it comes to that. He doesn't leave anyone out.
Now my guru Maharaj is away on a north american bus tour and he won't return until August 23rd. So I am still doing my service for him although lately I've had no wood polish so I could not do that service for him and I felt a bit upset about it. But today I went to the dollar store and found some wood polish for 2 dollars. I can't stand it when there is a certain type of service I have ot do for Maharaj and I don't have the product for it to complete the service. I want to keep up with the cleaning and have it nice by the time he comes back. August 22nd will be much too busy to really try to get anything done because there will be so many people here so I want to try to finish the cleaning before hand.
Everytime Maharaj is away I always get terrified thinking "Am I serving Maharaj properly? Am I pleasing him?" I am very concious of this. Im determined to keep my guru Maharaj very pleased.
I've should have asked him this over the phone whne I talked to him but we didn't have time he was very very busy.
Sometimes too I always get concerned about when I am invited to go somewhere with devotees, but to me it didn't seem very spiritual and I feel like I must consult with Maharaj first. I hate doing things without his approval. It's just how I am. I'm trying to train myself to keep my mind focused on just Krishna. Even the smallest of things will disturb me when I am trying to focus on Krishna. So this is one reason why if I feel to me something doesn't feel right about going to a certain place or doing a certain thing, I feel I must have Maharaj's approval first. I love going out with devotees, just as long as it's something spiritual because my mind needs to be fixed on Krishna.
A New Tulasi Devi Plant
I have gotten so much more attached to Tulasi than I have last year. Being here in Toronto with her really got me attached to her. My guru Maharaj told me to continue serving Tulasi so I am simply following his instructions.
In the morning I dress her by putting on one of her pretty dresses. I dressed her with the blue and orange dress today. I also set up her aarti tray in the morning and then during Tulasi puja I do aarti for her. So I had gotten attached to doing these things for her. I love seeing her first thing in the morning, because she helps me to get anxious to see Krishna in the morning then too.
Last weekend a guest must have forgotten their tulasi plant. I found her in a plastic bag the next morning by Prabhupada's vyasa san. And when I saw her there I immediately took her upstairs and took care of her this week. It was a good thing I checked to see what was in the bag! I have a sharp eye for Tulasi and can sense her presence whenever she's around. And last month I had found her in the botique and she hadn't been taken care of so I took her upstairs with the other ones to look after until they find homes for them. I am also looking after 40 other baby tulasi plants until they find homes for them. The baby Tulasis are doing very well as are the older ones.
Then later in the morning after breakfast I immediately go upstairs to take care of her. I give her a water spray bath and on Mondays I give her the insect spray to keep the white flies and spider mites off of her. I also give her a little water every day due to the hot weather here in Toronto. Also I pick her manjaris when she has them and her leaves I don't have to pick becasue she automatically drops them when I spray her with water. I also clean her room too like I did in New Vrndavan during the winter.
Awhile back I had to transplant one Tulasi plant as she was in another pot with another Tulasi and her branches were touching the other Tulasi so She definately needed to have her own pot. Since I transplanted her she is doing very well. I've been keeping close watch on her.
Then just earlier this week on Monday I planted three Tulasi seeds. and just yesterday one of them started growing! Today she now has two teeny tiny green leaves that are starting to open. I have also been keeping an extremely close watch on this baby Tulasi. I've already become so attached to her. I hope she will be big enough for Maharaj to see when he comes back, I really would love to show her to him.He'd be very pleased. These past two mornings I have gone into Tulasi's room and chanted my rounds there and it seemed to help the baby tulasi seeds a bit. The other two tulasi seeds haven't started growing yet, but I hope they will. Now I am finding myself not wanting to leave her green house becasue I want to keep a close watch on the new tiny tulasi plant that is growing. She needs a lot of love and care to keep her strong. I think on Janmashtami I may stay up in her greenhouse just before midnight as I can see the doors open from there and it won't be as crowded hopefully by her greenhouse. But anyways, Im so happy about the little Tulasi plant that is growing now. As she gets bigger I will keep posting photos of her with the changes she goes thru when she gets bigger.
In the morning I dress her by putting on one of her pretty dresses. I dressed her with the blue and orange dress today. I also set up her aarti tray in the morning and then during Tulasi puja I do aarti for her. So I had gotten attached to doing these things for her. I love seeing her first thing in the morning, because she helps me to get anxious to see Krishna in the morning then too.
Last weekend a guest must have forgotten their tulasi plant. I found her in a plastic bag the next morning by Prabhupada's vyasa san. And when I saw her there I immediately took her upstairs and took care of her this week. It was a good thing I checked to see what was in the bag! I have a sharp eye for Tulasi and can sense her presence whenever she's around. And last month I had found her in the botique and she hadn't been taken care of so I took her upstairs with the other ones to look after until they find homes for them. I am also looking after 40 other baby tulasi plants until they find homes for them. The baby Tulasis are doing very well as are the older ones.
Then later in the morning after breakfast I immediately go upstairs to take care of her. I give her a water spray bath and on Mondays I give her the insect spray to keep the white flies and spider mites off of her. I also give her a little water every day due to the hot weather here in Toronto. Also I pick her manjaris when she has them and her leaves I don't have to pick becasue she automatically drops them when I spray her with water. I also clean her room too like I did in New Vrndavan during the winter.
Awhile back I had to transplant one Tulasi plant as she was in another pot with another Tulasi and her branches were touching the other Tulasi so She definately needed to have her own pot. Since I transplanted her she is doing very well. I've been keeping close watch on her.
Then just earlier this week on Monday I planted three Tulasi seeds. and just yesterday one of them started growing! Today she now has two teeny tiny green leaves that are starting to open. I have also been keeping an extremely close watch on this baby Tulasi. I've already become so attached to her. I hope she will be big enough for Maharaj to see when he comes back, I really would love to show her to him.He'd be very pleased. These past two mornings I have gone into Tulasi's room and chanted my rounds there and it seemed to help the baby tulasi seeds a bit. The other two tulasi seeds haven't started growing yet, but I hope they will. Now I am finding myself not wanting to leave her green house becasue I want to keep a close watch on the new tiny tulasi plant that is growing. She needs a lot of love and care to keep her strong. I think on Janmashtami I may stay up in her greenhouse just before midnight as I can see the doors open from there and it won't be as crowded hopefully by her greenhouse. But anyways, Im so happy about the little Tulasi plant that is growing now. As she gets bigger I will keep posting photos of her with the changes she goes thru when she gets bigger.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)